These days

Hearing words expressed by small people still hurt and get to the best of us. I have been fluctuating between normalcy and depression. The depression manifests in the morning most of the time. I try to combat it with my medications, but many times they are useless. I've gotten away from my meditation and Qi gong practice to my chagrin. I do, however, fill my life with volunteer work at an animal shelter, have a few patients, and still have my regular job, which I find unsatisfying. The job, not the other stuff. I'm human. I struggle. When someone says I'm stupid or I am never happy, it only reinforces the sadness and low self esteem I continue to feel. I've decided not to return to a place where I'm constantly torn down. It's self destructive and I don't need it in my life anymore.